Breakups in Romantic Relationships is one of the most dreadful things to think and talk about. It’s disturbing to even think you and your partner may not end up together. And the relationship not leading to a happy ever after.
Most times, when the things you’ve dreaded in your relationship come to reality it tends to bring your entire world crashing down on you in one fell swoop.
You feel your heart tearing apart into a thousand pieces. You start having regrets about things you should have done right, and things you shouldn’t have done at all.
You start thinking it’s your fault the relationship ended the way it did. And the break up is all your fault. Which might not really be the case, but a lot of times you shift the blame to yourself.
Moving on easily after a breakup is one of the hardest things to do. It’s so hard because someone whom you once loved so much won’t be a part of the good, bad and ugly moments of your life anymore.
It makes you want to cry your heart out, and you tend to feel like a loser who cannot keep his/her affairs together and all.
ALSO READ: Ways to being Happy after a breakup
It’s so sad, I know. But no matter what happens, life is bound to go on after a breakup. This would depend on your decision to move on and not force things between you and your ex at least.
Hence, below are steps to take to help you move on easily after a breakup;
1. Stop feeling sorry for yourself
You may think the breakup is your fault in so many ways. You may start wallowing in self-pity and thoughts that bring you down and makes you start thinking less of yourself.
Moreso, breaking up with your partner shouldn’t be the end of the world. Therefore, kindly embrace your loss, and move on with all the courage and determination left on the inside of you.
2. Don’t isolate yourself from your loved ones who still care about you.
When a breakup is fresh, all you might want to do is isolate yourself from your loved ones who still care about you genuinely. You shouldn’t allow this ever.
Try as much as you can to come out of the shell of being withdrawn. Hence, when you spend more time with your loved ones such as your family and friends. They help you loosen up and also move on easily.
3. Be disciplined not to overly go through old fun memories you might still have of your ex
Yeah, after a breakup, all your emotions are beclouded. And what you want to do is just dwell on all the fun and perhaps bad moments you once had with your ex.
In other words, don’t let yourself go through the torture of doing this. If possible, archive those old memories, or delete them from whatever source so you won’t be taunted by them.
4. Desist from calling/chatting/texting your ex
In the fresh moments of a breakup, you might want to always call your ex, send them countless messages and chats.
This might be you trying to talk them out of the decision of wanting a break and perhaps see reasons with you on why you guys should get back together and all. Which is not bad though. But if it’s done a few times and they still feel you are not needed anymore.
Endeavor you give them enough space and move on. As a matter of fact, delete their numbers from your phone if you are not strong-willed enough to stop reaching out to them.
5. Endeavour not to stalk your ex from all angles they might be or are on.
You might want to always check if your ex is online and how long he/she has been, you may want to check who and what they posted on their timeline and status and all that.
Try as much as you can to stop stalking them and hold yourself high with the dignity you have left and move on for good.
6. Try as much as possible not to talk about your breakup with everyone
Most people oftentimes ask certain sensitive questions, not because they really care. But because they want/need to know what’s up with you, so they can use it behind your back and make fun of you.
Hence, endeavor to keep your affairs together. And not let everyone know what’s up with you and what lead to your break up.
7. Take very good care of yourself
You owe yourself so much, to take very good care of yourself, the best ways you can after a break up with your ex.
You really need to do this because it’s one of the pointers to show others who care about you or don’t even care to see how well you’re doing, and how well you’re handling the breakup.
8. Give in all your very best to your job or studies or any other task you might have at hand
Strive to open up yourself to putting in all your very best in your job or your studies or any other task you might have at hand.
Do not let the cause of the breakup have a toil on you, by slowing you down. Or making you slack on your job. Or you lagging behind on your studies.
Or you performing below expectations because you are still feeling sorry for yourself due to the break-up. Kindly do not allow this.
9. Always remind yourself you deserve better and much more
Inasmuch as you were once in love with your ex, and you saw a future with him/her and things didn’t end up as you had wanted, shouldn’t make you see yourself in the light of deserving to be dumped or deserving less.
Never ever allow this. Always remind yourself you’re the best always, and you deserve much more, and someone who truly deserves you more than your wildest imaginations would surely come and make you feel how special you’re.
Moving on after a breakup is not so easy no doubt. But with the few crucial points above, they would help you move on easily after a breakup.
Hence, be open-minded once again, and believe a beautiful and blissful relationship and partner is ahead of you.
Christian Fregnan (Unsplash)