Does it really matter if my boyfriend try so hard to get my mother to like him?
You and your boyfriend have been happily dating for months, but you’ve noticed something perplexing recently. It seems he’s going out of his way to impress your mom and get her to like him.
He laughs too loudly at her jokes, eagerly offers to help with chores, and keeps bringing up shared interests.
You can’t determine why he’s trying so hard for your mom’s approval. Isn’t your opinion the one that matters?
Keep reading as we look at what might be driving his behavior.
Why Does My Boyfriend Try So Hard to Get My Mother to Like Him?
Here are possible reasons why your boyfriend try so hard to get your mother to like him:
1. He Knows She’s Important to You
The simplest explanation is that your boyfriend knows how important your mom is to you.
He sees the close bond you share and wants to make a good impression on someone so influential in your life.
Getting your mom’s approval gives him a better shot at having a smooth, long-lasting relationship with you.
2. He’s Envisioning the Future
If your relationship is getting serious, your boyfriend may be thinking ahead to major milestones like proposals, marriage, and building a life together.
Earning your mom’s blessing early on makes those future steps easier and more welcoming when the time comes. He wants to build the foundation now.
3. He Doesn’t Want to Cause Conflict
Alternatively, your boyfriend may be trying really hard with your mom because he doesn’t want to cause any friction in your relationship.
If he senses your mom is hard to win over or very protective, he’ll make extra effort to avoid you having to choose sides later on. He’s being proactive.
4. He’s a People Pleaser
Some personalities are just wired to be eager people pleasers. If your boyfriend is the type who wants everyone to like him, your mom is no exception.
He may not even realize how obvious his pandering is. For him, getting your mom’s approval is instinct, not premeditation.
5. He Didn’t Have a Good Mom Himself
For some men, a girlfriend’s mom provides the motherly bond they never had growing up.
If your boyfriend’s relationship with his own mom was troubled or distant, he might see your mom as a surrogate he’s trying especially hard to connect with. His behavior likely isn’t even conscious.
6. He’s Testing Your Reaction
Your overly-accommodating boyfriend may be actually testing your reaction to his behavior. Does he seem to lay it on thickest when you’re around?
He may be trying to make you jealous and prompt you to assert your claim on him. It’s not the healthiest impulse, but it does happen.
7. He Has an Ulterior Motive
On the darker side, your boyfriend may be currying favor with your mom to hide ulterior motives. Does he seem to be hiding something?
Gaining your mom’s trust can be a tactic for controlling guys or cheaters. Listen to your gut instincts about his motivations.
8. He Sees You as a Package Deal
When some people date, they don’t just see a partner – they see a whole family they want to join.
If your boyfriend is eager about your mom, it may be because he knows you two are a package deal. In his mind, dating you means dating your family, too.
9. He Wants a Strong Support System
Especially if his family life was turbulent, your boyfriend might crave the stability of a tight-knit, supportive family.
By getting close to your mom, he’s hoping to become part of a family system he can rely on for support, advice, comfort, and unconditional love.
Read Also: Why Does My Boyfriend Likes It When I Sleep?
Whatever his motivations, your boyfriend’s interest in your mom likely comes from a positive place of wanting to integrate into your life.
But if anything raises red flags, trust your instincts. In most cases, his effort shows commitment to building a strong foundation for your future together. Embrace having two of your favorite people who want to be close!
For more relationship advice from our experts, check out elizegan.com.
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