My Husband Yells at Me: 12 Reasons Why and How to Make Him Stop

Living with a husband who yells is stressful and unhealthy.

There are always two sides to every story but there are some common reasons why husbands yell that can help provide insight into how to address the problem.

This post will explore 12 potential reasons why your husband yells and offer suggestions on how to make him stop and improve communication.

12 Reasons Your Husband Yells at You and How to Make Him Stop

My Husband Yells at Me 12 Reasons Why and How to Make Him Stop

Here are possible reasons why your husband is constantly yelling at you and ways to stop him from this habit:

Reason 1: Stress and Poor Coping Mechanisms

We all feel stressed at times but some people don’t have healthy ways to release and process their stress.

Yelling is an unhealthy coping mechanism. Some signs of general life stress could be financial problems, work issues, health problems, etc.

To make him stop, help him identify the source of stress and encourage him to adopt healthier coping strategies like exercise, journaling, or talking through problems.

Reason 2: Anger Issues

For some, yelling is a sign of underlying anger problems or an inability to properly manage and express anger.

Anger issues often stem from childhood and past experiences. To stop the yelling, he may need counseling to work on managing his emotions in a non-destructive way.

Be patient, don’t engage during outbursts but encourage counseling.

Reason 3: Poor Communication Skills

Some people simply don’t know how to effectively communicate when upset. They end up yelling without meaning to.

To improve, find books on communication skills and attend communication workshops together. Practice active listening, using “I feel” statements, and compromising.

Reason 4: Control/Power Issues

For some, yelling is about regaining a sense of control or power in the relationship or over their partner.

This is a red flag and a sign of a potentially unhealthy relationship. Seek couples counseling at once to address the power dynamic and find healthier ways to feel heard and respected.

FAQs

How Do I Know if It’s Just Yelling or if It Could Escalate to Abuse?

Pay attention to other controlling, disrespectful, or physically aggressive behaviors beyond just yelling.

Trust your gut – if you feel unsafe, talking things through may not be enough and you should remove yourself from the situation until he gets help.

What if He Won’t Go to Counseling?

Going to counseling together should not be optional if the relationship is to be saved. However, you can’t force him.

For your safety, set a timeline and be prepared to separate if he refuses to work on improving communication in a healthy way with a counselor.

How Can I Stay Calm When He Yells?

It’s difficult but responding to anger with more anger will only make things worse. Remove yourself from the situation until you both calm down.

Then use calm, non-accusatory language to discuss how the yelling made you feel and your desire to resolve conflicts respectfully.

Consider counseling to work on communication tactics.

Final Thought

While the exact reasons are unique to each relationship, the common themes here provide insight into the potential causes of a husband’s yelling.

Through patience, open communication, and professional help if needed, many couples can work through such issues.

But safety should always come first. With effort from both partners, it is possible to make him stop yelling and establish healthier dynamics built on respect.

Counseling is highly recommended when communication breaks down.